


Kitt Wyoming

by InsominiacArrest



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Teachers, F/F, Getting Together, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-05
Updated: 2017-12-09
Packaged: 2018-10-28 09:34:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 11,556
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10828554
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InsominiacArrest/pseuds/InsominiacArrest
Summary: Peridot and Lapis are high school teachers, Peridot is the physics teacher who is loud and makes puns about entropy, Lapis is the biology teacher who wishes both her and her students were asleep at any given pointthey share a tiny office, dance around each other, and their students ship themTeachers AU





	1. Walk as Far as You Can

**Author's Note:**

> put on my grave: cause of death attempting to write one-shots that spiraled into 7k long multi-chapters

Kitt Wyoming.

One highway, five gas stations, three seven-elevens, population 9,127- and shrinking.

It was thirty miles from Laramie up 30th North and the popular destination for truckers and lost tourists who needed to get to Colorado for drugs or Utah for God.

They said that no one came to Kitt to be there, but to stop being somewhere else, of course, Lapis herself never wanted to be anywhere so it was a good enough place to be nowhere at all.

Lapis worked at a New York City private school before. Upstate, basically in Manhattan.

She lived in a nice enough highrise with three other people and in the company of noise and more noise. Personal reasons, to say the least, pushed her feet thousands of miles away, to disappear into the dusty plains and herself.

The kids this time didn’t arrive in Lamborghini's, the kids didn’t ask who designed her shoes, the kids had nowhere etched into their lungs and fingernails.

Lapis walked that way.

“Do birds know that they could be dinosaurs?” Lapis heard the question, Lapis definitely heard the question. Her back was still turned as she held her chalk delicately in hand, she flinches, she hadn’t called on him.

Lapis turns around slowly, they were doing a unit on marine life, she sighs internally.

“Yes, Jeremy?”  
  
Jeremy’s eyebrows were knit together, this was the Sophomore class, approximately 20 kids and shrinking. Jeremy set his jaw, “I’m just saying, do they know they could be dinosaurs again, or do they just choose not to like idiots?”  
  
Lapis’s mouth hung open, she had a unit on fish anatomy to do. She had an aspirin lying on her desk waiting for her.

“Ohmygod,” the girl next to him elbowed him in the ribs, the one who took a bus an hour to get here and lived where mapmakers never drew, “Birds don’t _choose_ to be anything, they can’t think dummy.”

Lapis put her finger in the air, “Many birds can and do think actually Kendra, African gray parrots are known to be able to have original language skills-” She says rotely.

“There you go,” Jeremy elbows her back, “No reason they shouldn’t be tryin’ harder. You said they were dinosaurs once right miss?” He asked innocently, batting his long lashes, the class was interested now.

Sean Tanner raised his hand high in the air, “But we can’t choose _how_ we evolve.”  
  
“Why not?” Someone else asked, “I mean, if they put themselves in the right place.” Bethany Brooks said as she played with the end of her scarf fastidiously.  
  
“No, no, no, it just happens!” Kendra, farm girl and new defender of science it seemed, shot back.

Lapis put her hands up, she wasn’t going to have another water cycle debate involving wooly mammoths on her hands, “Kids, kids,” She clapped her hands together, “Evolution is a natural process over millions of years. And they don’t choose-”  
  
“Why not?”  
  
Lapis reminds herself about her aspirin, “Our unit on evolution will continue into next week.” They had started in the ocean, thank God the school board barely cared about ventilation systems, much less whether or not she taught evolution. “We can explore how it is a gradual process by birth and survival, the environment ‘chooses’ who is best fit.” She tries to explain it simply.

“Then why doesn’t-” Here they go, Lapis widens her stance prepared to turn around and draw a fish on the board so large it would at least quiet them for a little. However, she doesn’t have to draw mega-fish.

The door on the side of the room swings open, Lapis back straightens, hoping it wasn’t an observer for the class that day.

“Oh,” A short woman in a tweed suit and elbow patches stalked in, her blonde hair as erect as it ever was, like she wanted to be Einstein with a hangover, “Pay no attention to me.”  
  
She walked in the front of the classroom, trying to pass relatively neatly in front of them as she made her way to the science teachers office that happened to be off of the side of the science room. Lapis blew air out of her nose.

“Ooooooooooooh,” The class oohed like they were on a television set, Lapis scrunched her nose up and she swears she sees Peridot give a crooked grin.

“Will you guys not do that?” She mumbled to herself so only the front row could hear. Melony Bracket grinned into her hand.

“Professor P!” One of the kids yelled, “Why do you think birds don’t try to be dinosaurs again?” Lapis pulled at her hair, now they were just trying to mess with her.

Peridot paused, her cool-teacher demeanor kicking in, Lapis grinds her teeth, “Professor ‘P’,” Lapis says slowly, “has some Bill Nye videos to get to and her subject is that of bottle rockets. Not biology.” She says steadily, Peridot was glancing at her slowly.

“Yes of course, no plant matter for me!” She sings as she straightens her jacket, “Remember kids, the phrase of the day is ‘entropy just isn’t what it used to be’.” She winks with a laugh.

The class laughed, most likely not because they knew what it meant, but because she said it in her silly voice.

Lapis clenched her hands, her irritation sprinkling under her skin, “Yes, yes, they completely know what that is. I have to return to a lesson.”  
  
Peridot gave a short bow, “I won’t keep you.” Lapis narrowed her eyes, the class snickers to itself and Lapis doesn’t like the looks the kids are giving them.

Lapis turned toward the board and continued to right the saline concentration of fish and about their freshwater versus ocean acidity levels, another kid called out, “Maybe you and professor P could discuss dinosaurs over dinner?”  
  
Lapis flinches.

Who knew country kids were more gossipy and less hetero-centric than expected.

\-----------

Lapis wasn’t sure she liked being ‘shipped,’ she wasn’t sure if she liked getting out of bed in the morning in all honesty.

She shared a small four by five yellow closet of a teacher’s office with Peridot 'P,' real last name Penalli, they tried to dance around each other liked cramped solar systems passing in the night, but it was harder than it looked. They shared the room, the classroom, and the title of ‘those two science teachers.’

There were two cramped desks that nearly touched as they sat across from each other, both were varying degrees of messy with papers stacked against walls, pencils and pens scattered and two opposing laptops. The floor was a cracked beige under two black office chairs (Lapis had stolen the good one from the counseling office), and the walls were yellow.

Walls as yellow as a yield light on a traffic signal, yellow as a harvest moon or the inside of sea cucumbers (senior thesis dissection), as yellow as the end of the world.

As a child, Lapis had a near-death experience and swore she saw the sun exploding like a bursting gumdrop and she held her breath as she waited the eight minutes it took to reach her. The sky was a brilliant saturated yellow all across the fiery atmosphere.

Peridot looked at her as Lapis downed her aspirin, a treat for herself, Peridot leaned forward, she tapped her pen on the desk and then looked up again, “How’re the kids on your marine unit?”

Lapis slumped over, “I wish I could do microbes for the whole semester,” She grumbles, she was great at microbes, “And they would all just fall asleep.”

Peridot tutts at her, “You know the point of being a teacher is to keep your students awake right?” She said mildly.

Lapis yawns, “Maybe for you. I would teach nap time if I had the choice.”  
  
Peridot sighs and leans forward, “I can tell.” She says flatly.

They descend into an awkward pause, it was an awkward space. Lapis balls up one of the useless memos they sent out every two months or so, reminding them that the air conditioning would be fixed eventually.

She leans back in her chair and lightly tosses the scrap with a flick of her wrist and watches it arch delicately through the air. It sails like the hopes and dreams of LA actors down, Lapis watches it bounces off the lip of the trashcan.

“Oooh,” Lapis grimaces, “So close.”

Peridot looks down at the crinkled trash at her feet, “Another one for the disappointment board.” She responds dryly and points at their scratched chalk board that held an ironic number of tallies on it.

Lapis shakes her head and her knees feel like snapping rubber bands as she stands up and walks to the corner, she places a tally with their last piece of good chalk.

Peridot taps on her desk, “What was the last one for?”

Lapis looked over her shoulder weakly, “Waking up at 7.”  
  
“Don’t you do that everyday?”

Lapis snorts and doesn’t respond, just kneels down slowly and paws at the white sheet of paper she had thrown. Peridot was watching with a look on her face of a confused cocker spaniel.

Lapis sighs and eases herself onto the floor, sitting down as she places the thing in the trash. She lets her eyes drifts up and she stares at the ceiling languidly.

Peridot placed her head on her desk in her periphery, “Lapis Lazuli.” Lapis doesn’t twitch at her name, “There’s a sad cat in my neighborhood.”  
  
Lapis makes a face and rests the back of her head on the wall, “Okay?”  
  
Peridot snorts, “I’m going to name it after you.”  
  
Lapis furrows her brow and Peridot laughs to herself lightly, Lapis rocks forward, “I’m naming the blender in my house after _you_.”

Peridot got up and they both glanced at the clock, teachers had to stay a half hour after school to do office hours, no one usually came. Peridot put her papers in order and then turned to her slowly, “Why?”

“Transparent and always yelling. Lot’s of buttons to push.” She says as she crosses her legs and makes a small pointed smile.

Peridot opens her mouth and then closes it, before she can say anything the school bell rings like the coming revelation. Metallic and weeping a soft sound of relief.

Peridot reached for her briefcase (she really brought a briefcase) and Lapis rolled herself off the faded floor.

They part quickly with the yellow walls to their backs and pass the flat dark desks of their classroom. They emerge the partially filled hallways and part ways. Some students had ‘extra-hours’ after school and the bell dismissed them as well.

Lapis climbs the stairs in ones and twos to make it to her Oldsmobile she bought off the first person she met in New Jersey. It somehow was still going.

She sighs and wobbles to the dented door, she pauses as she yanks at the handle, looking up thoughtfully at the pale blue sky.

  
Peridot was going to name the sad stray cat after her.


	2. Hallways as Friendly as Rumors

The story started the week Peridot arrived at the school, last semester in the heat of August that swam in Lapis’s head like a swamp fish through fog.

She materialized like anyone in Kitt did: overnight and for no apparent reason, people didn’t asks and she didn’t say, Peridot was no self-contained anomaly and Kitt was that kind of place.

Peridot reminded Lapis of an over-enthused caricature of a college professor trying to  _ reach _ you, maybe that’s why Lapis started the whole thing. But that probably not why Lapis started the whole thing.

The interaction became quickly known for via word of mouth at Buchanan High School. Lapis didn’t like that, she didn’t like being known for anything. But she also started it.

Peridot loved Bill Nye, Peridot loved to entertain, Peridot Penalli loved to yell and jump up on desks with the best of them. And Peridot seemed to love things as if they were always the best thing.

It had been the first week with the new Ms. ‘P,’ she arrived in the classroom with a bang and crash and no sense of shame. Lapis was doing grading in their shared office. Lapis hated grading.

Her mind was draping itself over a grand piano like a sulking Victorian lady as she tried to concentrate on the ‘entrance quizzes’ she sometimes gave to an advanced class. 

Her attention was regularly dragged to the adjacent room and one of Peridot’s first lesson. She was loud (and loved things as if they were all the best thing).

It was a pretty basic introduction with a quiet stilted class in her wake, but Lapis was trying to be bored by the whole thing, then Peridot gave her closing speech.

“Can anyone tell me why physics is the most useful science?” Lapis’s hand stopped moving across the page.

“Yes! You in the front.” Peridot’s voice carried.

“Too much math?” One of those students who entertained for the sake of entertaining.

“Oh yes!” Even Lapis jumped at that outburst, she imagined her slapping a rule on the chalkboard, “One of the many reasons Physics is the best topic is math! That’s not the whole reason, but kids, math,” She says breathlessly, “math is the handwriting of creation itself.” She said it with romance in her mouth and with the conviction of a monk.

“Oh my God.” Lapis says as her eyes glazed over, she turned her head toward the door, “She can’t really…” She couldn’t really, could she?

“Physics tells us the world, the physical world, the unknown world, the dark matter at the edge of the universe and beyond!” Lapis’s mouth was slightly open now, “Physics is the hardest sciences frankly, but that’s what makes it the most worth doing.” As a biologist, Lapis imagined tripping the other women in the hallway.

“Kids!” Peridot spouted as Lapis considered her own hand and Tony Green’s penmanship, “I’m about to teach you the most meaningful thing in the world. How objects move and the known universe comes together.”

She couldn’t be for real.

 

\---------------

Peridot was as real as an ulcer, and Lapis was very familiar with ulcers (she had already decided to name her next one ‘Mrs. P!’). She was boastful in the way Lapis imagined the ego of the entire Republic of Seattle was, she was as short as she was earnest.

Lapis, on the other hand, had a sense of the common good, Lapis was simply taking the opportunity, a defender really, on the behalf of light teasing and the ‘soft’ sciences everywhere.

She began her venture with a little light stalking in the hallways, sometimes good things start with a little light stalking.

It wasn’t a large school, but it was a rather sprawling design. There was a lot of space in Kitt Wyoming and the architecture seemed to try to out-consume that vacuum with the fervor of something trying not to be eaten. Of course, some people wanted to be consumed, but Buchanan High School had kids, kids often wanted other things.

Lapis followed her in the long hallways lit by the hopes and dreams of the fluorescent lights trying to stay on, and Lapis padding after her casually.

Peridot was walking in the hallways with a student, Mike Hamm, he was nodding with his head, but also maybe his entire body, it was hard to tell. Mike wore skinny jeans, maroon shirts, and Lapis didn’t mind his attachment to the other little teacher who wore bowties and suits. Then again, of course:

Peridot had her eyes closed and her voice like a water sprinkler in the middle of June, “... you see, there really is nothing more fascinating than the discovery of dark matter making up most of the universe.”   
  
Mike nodded.    
  
“One of the most important discoveries of the last decades I’m afraid.”   


Lapis felt her temple pulse, she tasted her next move in her mouth, she grabbed the arm of the nearest student, Susan Miranda, and talks to her like they were having an in depth conversation.. She looks at the back of Peridot’s head as she does.

“You’re right Susan!” She says in the loudest talking voice she had.

“Uh,” Susan’s large brown eyes filled her face.

“It’s too bad physics has to redact so much information constantly, an impressive science with little practical use!”

Peridot turned around like she had a tick in her neck, the other teacher stopped in place, “excuse me?”

“That is too bad?” Susan mumbled as they walked.

“It really is! It’s not like new medical innovations have been dwarfing dwarf planet reclassification, truly, vaccines saving millions, telescopes being fun.”   
  
Peridot’s brow knit together, “If we’re going to get off this rock-”   
  
Lapis gave a hollow laugh, she had very few opinions, and these weren’t any different, she did however savor the color rising in color in Peridot’s cheeks “It’s a good thing there’s grounded, cute, and possibly blue-haired women in other fields that  _ help _ people.”   
  
“Now wait just a minute-”

Lapis finally made hard eye contact with Peridot as the sashayed past, heading to the library with a little kick to her step, “I hear physics put venus retrograde.”   
  
“That’s not physics!” Peridot was balling up her little hands, “Don’t give me that soft science speech,” Peridot says darkly, she looked her up and down, “ _ plant matter girl. _ ”   
  
Lapis winked at her before scowling every so slightly, “negative space women.”   
  
They turn their backs on each other.

\-------------------

So it was some light teasing, like a promise or a back and forth in old movies. Or maybe just a ‘hallway hobby.’

It’s not like they were openly hostile to each other, they chatted in the teacher’s lounge and asked each other questions in their office about ways to coordinate their lesson plans.

But what choice did Lapis had? The students had to know.

It was friendly, ‘you’re looking awfully like a black hole today. Maybe you could explain how they function? Oh we don’t completely know?’

And a returned, ‘spend all your research funding on figuring out how a cat purrs, huh? It’s a shame we can’t even figure that out either.’

They may or may not leave little notes on each other’s desk saying ‘viva la pluto :)’, not because Lapis believed it, but it certainly did annoy her. She found a little doodle of DNA on her desk with a little scribble saying ‘it’s almost as twisted as you :0’

It was friendly. Honest. And they certainly did pass each other in the hallway a lot.

Unfortunately, it seemed the students were in the hallways as well. The whispers started out as mysterious bubbles that made as much sense as the weather patterns in their city. 

Lapis sometimes forgot the kids paid her much mind. She was after all the dour looking biology teacher who liked fish too much.

But she heard it in little giggles as the students started to point.

Lapis feigned ignorance, students always giggled. That was up until a week before Christmas break, they were bundled up like pre-packaged beef jerky in coats and it was first thing in the morning.

Snow was wafting through the sky like a threatening incense and Lapis had dark clouds in her gut from arriving with numb toes.

Peridot came up to her with a pleasant smile as they passed in the English hall, most likely returning from the teacher’s lounge.

Lapis nodded her head at her and Peridot passed her slowly, Lapis shook the snow out of her snarled hair, Peridot made sly eye-contact.

“Hello Lazuli,” Lapis twitches, “Lovely today.” She leaned forward, “You look like the bottom of the ocean, still 70% unexplored huh?”

Lapis smiled back, trying to get her footing, “It’s a good thing that’s 26% more than space has.”

“Wow,” Peridot blinks, “It looks like you haven’t heard about Mars. More mapped than ever.”   
  
They were apart to engage in overall spiked debate when a voice carried over from the distant corners of the student locker section.

“Maybe you could keep your exploration to the bedroom! I heard it could use some data.” She didn’t know where that came from.

Lapis’s mouth hung open, she turned around with her puffy coat making her sweat a little more. “Excuse me?”   
  
What even were students again.

Katie Hemming’s eyes sparkled as she turned to the pair of Lapis and Peridot, “It sounds like you have a lot of differences Ms. Lazuli.” The student says politely, Lapis nods nacl dumbly, “My parents always do long car rides to settle things like that.”   
  
“Uhhh,” Lapis’s eyes were still wide, she wasn’t sure of what Peridot was doing, “No?” She tilts her head.

She smiles at her. The bell rings.

Peridot and Lapis glance at each other, “That’s something.” Peridot says blankly.

Lapis tucks her head down and stiffly walks forward, “See you in the office.”   
  
They part ways, a prickle under her skin and her hair full of icicles. Peridot left her new note on her desk that day, it said ‘the cat is doing well.’


	3. Solving Problems

Lapis was having a weird moment in her life. Maybe that’s what happens when you run away from stressful everything in upper east New York City, kids stopped asking about her shoe designer and started asking you about if she was going to show a fellow teacher your Bonobo video.

She was _not_ going to show Peridot her goddamn Bonobo video.

She slouched loosely in the teacher’s lounge and took a deep sip of coffee, it was darker than the ending of most lesbian films and richer than she expected when she first came here. Coffee got more decent the farther you get away from people who cared deeply about the quality of coffee it seemed.

Lapis rested her head on her own shoulder and looked at the blue and white tiles unseeingly, her mouth became a thin line and her thoughts swam into each other.   
  
“Hey Laz!” Lapis jumped, a shorter figure waved at her as she entered the room.

Lapis lifted her chin and raised her eyebrows at Amethyst, “Health already over?” She asked, checking if she was late for her next class or not.

“Sorta,” Amethyst shrugged, “let them out early when someone asked what vore was from the internet, and woo,” She whistled, “I decided to dodge a bullet.”

Lapis grinned and gave a brief cheer to her, “Not all heroes wear capes.”  
  
Amethyst chuckles, “Yeah, if Pearl doesn’t see any of them and eat my ass out for it.”   
  
Lapis twitched, a small smirk grew on her face from the word choice, “Uh-huh.”   


Amethyst tossed a coffee filter at her lightly, “Ugh, God, this is real. I think I could make a mosaic of the write ups she’s given me.”

Lapis snorted, Pearl was the administrative head and made lists and boxes and write ups and organized vague things about the memos Lapis balled up in her hands and threw in the trash.

Lapis always wondered why one of them didn’t become principal, but perhaps schools like theirs were better off with no leaders, no Gods, and no ceiling fans. That was just how it was.

Amethyst was balancing herself on the counter, “Soooo,” She twirled a strand of her long lilac hair, “What does your third period tomorrow look like?”  
  
Lapis groaned and scrubbed her face with her free hand, “No, come on.”   
  
Amethyst made a face, “Come on! I have a doctor's appointment.”

Lapis narrowed her eyes, “I swear if you just go to smoke weed…”  
  
Amethyst stuck her tongue out, “I don’t do it on school time, Jesus.” Amethyst folded her arms across her chest, “a real thing, a real...doctor thing.”   
  
Lapis slumped forward, “I’m gonna have them fight.”   
  
Amethyst lifted an eyebrow, “right.”   
  
“I’m gonna do it. Gym pit brawl, winner gets an A.” She crossed her arms over her chest.   
  
Amethyst taught health, catering, gym, and wood shop at the school, though Pearl often filled in for shop or co-taught it despite being mostly administration. She sometimes helped with Home Ec too but they only sometimes offered Home Ec.

Amethyst sometimes had Lapis fill in for her third period gym class.

“You know they are hormonal beasts,” Amethyst said with a gleam in her eye, “You give 'em the chance and they will wallop each other. No pit needed.”  
  
“Pit! Pit! Pit!” Lapis cheered sardonically, “It will be controlled, contained, the perfect place for kid fights 2017.”   
  
Amethyst shook her head and pointed to one of the coffee mugs, Lapis handed it to her slowly.

“Fiiiine,” Amethyst exhaled dramatically, “I’ll catch up on Twin Peaks some other time.”  
  
Lapis poked her in the cheek and laughed, “that’s my girl.”   
  
Amethyst looked outside and then raised her cup in the air, “Almost Friday, we’re making it.”   
  
Lapis paused, reflecting on the day of the week, “Ugh,” She said as she glanced down at her watch, “I should go do grading. I would rather die than do it over the weekend.” That was her me time.

Amethyst nodded in understanding, “Tell Peridot I want a list of her puns from today, I’m starting a mood board in the art hall.”  
  
Lapis rolled her eyes, “Your friendship amazes me.”   
  
Amethyst snickered and pushed her hair out of her eyes, “Trust me. Yours is much more interesting.”   
  
Lapis frowned and walked out of the room.

\------------

Lapis ambled her way to her classroom only to realize Peridot was still teaching, she continually realized all her tests to grade were on the other side of the classroom.

Lapis groaned, she needed to stop doing this.

Peridot was writing on the board and saying something about things in motion staying in motion.

Lapis took that to heart and sighed at the door, she really hated grading over the weekend. She softly opened the classroom door and tried to sneak in.

She edged along the wall, pressing herself flat to the door and trying to creep alongside it. One of the seniors, George something, points at her. “Hey! Ms. Lazuli.”  
  
Lapis’s shoulders tensed, George gave her the look she didn’t like, the one that said he thought they were almost the same age now and he was about to inherit the world. Lapis knew his mother, she did fundraisers for the one room library, she at least liked his mother.

“Your skirt is pretty today.” He said as he looked down at her brown knee length pleated skirt, Lapis tried to sneak the other direction and pretend nothing was happening.

“Oh come on.” He was in the first row and other students were now looking in her direction now too. “Ms. Lazuli!” He called again and waved at her as if she wasn’t busy ignoring the sun falling into the ocean.

“Leave Ms. Lazuli alone.” Peridot says maternally from the front of the room, “She has a lot of chlorophyll and mitochondria to look at.”  
  
“Correct,” She said lightly and exhaled, it was over enough.

“I gave her a compliment,” Oh no. George was arguing. “It was simply being cordial Ms. P.” He said Peridot’s ‘P’ in the way people spit out popcorn kernels. Lapis winces.

“George,” Peridot said evenly, “Let’s get back to our laws, you’ll need to know this for the test.”  
  
He leaned forward and his russet brown hair looked fiery in the light, he glanced between the two teachers, “I was saying it was a nice skirt, let her respond to me,” He huffed, “She’s not like you.”

Lapis blinked _, Fuck._

Lapis couldn’t believe the entire sky was falling, who would have thought.

Peridot sighed heavily, “You’re right,” Peridot stood up straight and righted her collar, “She’s a biologist! Much different things, much less math.” Peridot eased the tension as a couple kids chuckled.

“Ms. Lapis,” George was calling her by her first name, “No need-”  
  
Lapis turned around quickly to just get this all over with, she runs directly into Peridot who had stepped toward her, perhaps to de-escalate the conversation or make a pun about black holes. Who knew.

Lapis turned into her and Peridot faltered backward, dropping the ruler she always held in her hand.

Lapis jumped up straight, her cheeks burning, objects in motions really needed to learn how to stop being in motion. It was that kind of day.

“Sorry!” She sputters and Sally points at them with her grin as wide as the side of a barn, her friend Mike nodded too.

“Ms. Lapis,” George was standing up, “honestly, don’t walk away, it’s a little friendly conversation. I’m starting to think-”  
  
Lapis kept her eyes on Peridot, she glanced down to the floor where the ruler was, “I’ll get that!” She yelps and bends down to grab the ruler for Peridot and bolt like nothing happened.

“Don’t ignore me.” She heard a growling voice and then felt her skirt tugged, roughly tugged, a slip of fabric falls down her hips.

_Fuck x2._

She wished there was less George’s in the world, less people perhaps, maybe just dogs. Lot’s of dogs. A murmur rang around the room with a couple short gasps.

Lapis realized her striped blue underwear was the new and interesting furnishing of the small classroom. Lapis groaned internally.

She could yell now, she could yell later, or she could yell internally for an indefinite amount of time.

Lapis instead wets her lips, underwear still in the air, and places the palm of her hand up to her lips.

_Pppfffttt_

She blows a raspberry into her damp palm and a few kids gave a surprised laugh.

_Pffffffttt_

She blows again with a little shake, the class’s volume increases, she’s not sure what George is saying, but that’s really the point.

It turned out fart noises were in fact, sometimes, the answer.

She stepped out of her brown skirt, picked it up and walked it to the office door.

“See me after class.” She said to George with an icy determination. She would just send him to the principal’s office, but they didn’t have a principal and their Vice-Principal Garnet Williams was usually just walking around the school. Lapis would take George to her herself.

Lapis gets into the yellow yellow room and slips back into the loose skirt she bought half-off at a JC Penny, she tells herself to consider pants from now on.

She heard Peridot give a hurried lecture to the tense silence of the rest of the students. Lapis collected her tests she has to grade but can’t concentrate. She laid her head on the cool wood of her desk and exhaled, she would have to grade over the weekend.

The bells rang and Lapis walked out of the office with her look she gave essays she was about to destroy with a red pen. She doesn’t even look at George as she gestured to him. He was almost whimpering.

“I didn’t really mean to, and honestly, it’s not like you gave me a choice, you were ignoring me and it can really hurt student confidence, I’m really sorry.” George babbled and Lapis walked, he stays in place, maybe it was the look she was giving him.

Mike and his friends were at the end of the hall, dragging Garnet Williams in their direction.

“George needs to go fuck himself!” Mike said loudly and Lapis could see George’s eyes go wide.

“Wait, wait,” Lapis stepped aside.

Lapis looks up at the tall Garnet Williams, “Did they tell you?” She noded shortly and Lapis lifts her chin, “you should call his parents.”  
  
Garnet sprouted a rare smile, “My pleasure.”   
  
Lapis watched George in the process of talking to his mom, and probably deciding to stop talking to any other women for awhile. His mom is not happy and honestly it was almost as pleasing to watch as drinking a hot cup of tea on a rainy day.

Lapis wondered if she can assign feminist literature to her senior year Biology class syllabus. She doubted it, but you never knew.

He’s suspended for two days and George’s mom assured them he was going to spend that week watching documentaries of suffragette movements.

Lapis snickered and assured the woman it was nothing that hadn’t happened before.

She gets back to her office a little more than forty-five minutes later.

She’s replaying the look on George’s face and also the fact Garnet would probably give her a pass on being late to work a couple times this week.

She straightens her hair as she gets back to her desk.

“How’d it go?” Lapis jumped when she heard a voice greet her.

Lapis clutched at her chest, “Jesus.”  
  
Peridot was all wide green eyes and earnest attention from the side of the room. She had been sitting at her desk apparently, Lapis stood up straight.

“Were you... waiting for me?” Lapis asked slowly.

Peridot frowned deeply and looked her up and down, “Are you alright? Is he in trouble?”  
  
“Oh yeah,” She grinned, “He’s in a lot of trouble, and suspended, and maybe we’ll have a school assembly on it.”   
  
Peridot nodded like her head was on a spring, “Thank God.” Her eyes shine, “I am so sorry that happened.”   
  
Lapis had never known the proud little physics teacher to direct so much concern at others, Lapis swayed from side to side, “Nah, not your fault, we just get a lot of kids. Some of them are gonna be dealing with their own concepts of manners and performative masculinity.”

That got Peridot to crack a smile, “You don’t say.”  
  
Lapis punched her ever so lightly on the shoulder, “I’m made of tougher stuff than that. I’m from Brooklyn.”   
  
Peridot snorted and shook her head, “Brooklyn, Wyoming, I’m sure it’s the same thing.”   
  
Lapis took a deep breath and looked up at the ceiling, “Nah,” She waved a hand in the air and turned around, “Just teaches me to wear pants and never bend down, ever.”   
  
Peridot sighed behind her, “Well...tell me if there’s anything I can do.”

Lapis looked over her shoulder ever so slightly, “Um.” She didn’t know what to say.

Peridot furrowed her brow, “I feel like it was sort of my fault. I was the other adult in the room after all.”  
  
Lapis stood up straight, “Uh, well, George thought he was an adult too. That was the problem.”   
  
Peridot took a deep breath in through her nose, “He was badgering me about... Relationships. He didn’t like what the other kids were saying about me, uh, us.”   
  
Lapis gave a bark of a laugh, “Lapidot, oh yeah.”   
  
Peridot looked down at her shoes and pulled on a fray in her cuff link, “That’s probably my fault. He was all bent out of shape I was, uh, ‘like that,’” She does air quotations, “as he said, and I guess you were dragged in. We can shut down any rumors, stop them from dragging you into it.”   
  
Lapis eyes went wide, she put her hands on her hips, she let a beat pass and they stare at each other across the expanse of the room that was a sunburst yellow to the end of the world.

Lapis reached for her bags, then she fidgeted back to face Peridot, “And who says ‘I’m not ‘like that.’” They were having what Lapis qualified as a bizarre conversation.

Peridot shoulders froze and she studied her. “Uuuuuuh.”  


“Look,” Lapis fluffed her hair, “Don’t make presumptions.” She should carry around a flag or something, “And unless you want to grade my tests for me don’t feel like you need to do anything. These things happen.” She doesn’t look at her and instead looks at the vents.

Lapis gets her stacks of multiple choice and short answers questions gathered and puts them in her bag, Peridot was still watching her.

“Well,” Peridot articulated again, “I could.”  
  
Lapis paused, “Could?”   
  
Peridot pointed at the tests a little dumbly, “With the grading.”   
  
Lapis gave a little hop, “you’ll grade all of these for me? Because I was on the brink of giving them all just Bs.”   
  
Peridot gave her a hard look and rubbed her temple, “No, but I do have a patented grading method that makes it remarkably less painful.”   
  
Lapis shrugged her bag higher on her shoulder, “Is it the sweet release of death?”   
  
Peridot patted her on the shoulder, “Alright, plan B, but let’s try my way first.”

Lapis sniffed loudly, “why not. Not-death first.”

Peridot snorted gently and then nodded, they both get up and dust themselves off as the school lights start to flicker.  


They reach for the exit at the same time and dance around each other in a tango of ‘oh no you first, no you first.’ They turn the lights off and finally get to go home that Thursday night.

Peridot kept glancing at her and Lapis turned in her direction, “What’s this method?”  
  
Peridot cleared her throat, “A latte the size of a boat, a group, and nice cafe.”   
  
Lapis raised her eyebrows, “There’s only one coffee shop in town.”   
  
“I settle.”   
  
Lapis gave her a steady look, “Group?”   
  
Peridot shrugged, they were reaching the front of the very long school, “We stop each other from going on instagram.”

Lapis broke into a small smile, “So you want to take me out for coffee for having seen my underwear? Very gentlemanly.”  
  
Peridot shook her head, “This is a marathon of grading Lapis. You can thank me if we get through it.”   
  
Lapis’s eyes went wide, she laughed to her own surprise, “Very dramatic!”   


Peridot waved at her as she goes to cross the field, she didn’t have a car as far as Lapis knew. Lapis watched her leave slowly, “Oh captain, my captain!” She yelled after her with a little salute but Peridot was already gone and Lapis wasn’t so sure she’d know the reference anyway.

Lapis got into her car and wondered if anyone ever enters the twilight zone and wasn’t entirely sure about it. After all, if anywhere was going to be the Twilight Zone, it would probably be Wyoming and there wouldn't be much of a difference.

She thinks about Peridot's short yellow hair and brown tweed jacket for another five minutes until she finally starts her car and barely runs over any potholes on the way home for once.


	4. Taste-Test

Kitt Wyoming had an economy based around 12 cows and a gas station with a pay-by-quarters shower, it had exactly one coffee shop dedicated to just coffee and plenty of other places for a two-dollar dark roast. Truckers were a boom to small towns everywhere and the loving support of those twelve cows.

Lapis liked ‘Jo’s Coffee,’ she had never met Jo, Jo might be dead and the owner didn’t want to tell anyone, or maybe the owner  _was_ Jo and still didn’t want to tell anyone. People were like that here, kept to themselves like closed-system biodomes.

Jo’s Coffee had three exits, thoroughly labelled creamers, and two power outlets available to customers, Lapis was sure to tell Peridot that when she set the date for their Saturday grading session. She made Peridot swear to get out of bed by six, Lapis was not going to miss those power outlets.

Lapis settled on a gray turtleneck and blazer for the outing, they were just emerging out of winter into spring, but she didn’t want to take any chances. Weather here was as predictable as a printer when you’re in a hurry.

She stuffed her backpack with things she might need ranging from markers and stamps to a book that looked dense enough to bore a fellow academic (biology as a ‘less smart science’ could kiss her ass).

She left fifteen minutes early, air nippy at her cheeks and the morning chill soaking through her thick socks, she quickly got into her Oldsmobile (Henri) and blasted the heat for the short trip into the center of town.

She watched the strips of empty road pass as she headed to up to the main street. Sandy grass spread out around out in all directions, flat hills that merged into the sky and little fences that seemed to grow from the ground itself. The hills fed into slopes of very distant blue mountains that felt more like echos than locations.

She shook her head and concentrated on the paved street, basking in all the free parking spots before her in Kitt Wyoming, it was euphoric. Lapis still got a rush of adrenaline from having that many options- and from the fact she wouldn’t have to lease her first born child to stay there for more than two hours.

It was as sweet as a sugar rush.

She parked with a sloppy precision, sitting slightly off the curve and crooked, skills like neat parallel parking had become a somewhat distant skill once she arrived in Kitt. She got out of her car and straightened her blazer, tugging her bag out of the backseat and into her faltering arms.

She shuffled it onto her back and made her way over to the coffee shop.

Jo’s was awake, the regular barista was wiping down counters, and two bowed heads appeared in each corner spot.

“Come on power outlets…” She said through gritted teeth, praying to the Gods of electric sockets.

She skipped her way across the empty street and to the glass door that dinged when she opened it. Her eyes went wide when she spied a backpack hefted right next to her outlets, claiming them.

“No,” She whined, her Gods forsaken her as a technological heretic, who neither believed in alternating currents or any voltage below 150. Her face falls.

“Lapis!” Lapis turns around quickly at her name, Peridot waved excitedly at her, “I got the seats you wanted.”  
  
Lapis went a little stiff, something churning inside her like a sleeping ocean waking up, Peridot got her the seats she wanted. She waved back, “nice!”

She ordered the largest cappuccino and felt Peridot stare at her as she walked over to set up.

“You’re looking dapper today Lazuli.” Peridot said cheerily, a little too cheerily for that early in the morning but she lets that slide. Lapis plugged her computer, Peridot grinned, “A fine jacket.”

“Thanks,” She finally said, “It’s covered in dog hair, but that’s true of all my things.”  
  
“Ah,” Peridot said with her finger in the air, “Lady MacBeth, the German Shepherd.”

Lapis finally cracked a post-dawn smile, “That’s right.” She said softly, “Good memory doc.”  
  
Peridot shook her head, “it’s a memorable name.”   
  
Lapis pushed a strand of hair back, “my parents always named their pets after Shakespeare characters, so uh, yeah.”   
  
They blinked at each other, something else soaked into Lapis’s core.

“For a Lapis.”

Her name is called for the cappuccino by the woman behind the counter. The barista, Liddy, gave Lapis a look of a slightly interested bird of prey as she handed her the drink. And then she went back to scrubbing.

Lapis plopped herself down in front of Peridot, she’s not sure if she should be talking to her or grading already at this point.

She settled for clapping her hands down on the table, “So,” She leaned forward, “What’s this patented grading method?”

Peridot made a strangely cat-like face, a cat with milk in this case, and clicked a red pen in her hand, “I’m glad you asked.”  
  
Lapis made a soft sound but Peridot is already busy at work, “It’s really a tool of time management, we focus for 25 minutes with five minute breaks in between, and a half-hour break every two hours. Furthermore, we count how many tests we want done in each segment and try to hit each mark, plus drink enough coffee to stay focused enough to get through all that!” Peridot seemed excited.

Lapis spouted an almost-grin, “I’ll try,” She said hesitantly, “But if it’s a bore I’ll go back to my usual method of watching jeopardy and forcing myself to finish these at 2 in the morning.” Lapis never technically graduated out of her ‘procrastination’ portion of life, but maybe no one ever really did.

Peridot made a very defiant face at her and raised her pen in the air, “Let’s begin!” It sounded like a gunshot at a horse race, but it really just meant they start to shuffle through large stacks of folders.

Lapis taught five classes, three of which just had tests. She was not happy. And she didn’t know why she kept giving short answer questions since it meant she had to read. It also meant they would have to think critically about the material- so maybe she knew on some level why she assigned short answer questions.

She sipped her cappuccino and her eyes glaze over, she watched Peridot keep her head down and almost stick her tongue out comically as she worked. Lapis sighed and gets to her fifth test, maybe time management wasn’t her thing, but watching Peridot be faster than her was certainly motivating.

She squinted her eyes and concentrated, they had the life cycle of a frog to explain.

She began to decelerate by the twentieth page and Bobby Newhouse’s terrible handwriting, she squinted blurrily and messaged her temple, groaning slightly. She had no idea what he was trying to say and if his ‘b’s were actually poorly formed ‘s’s. 

Lapis jumped slightly when a phone buzzes on the table, she almost knocked her coffee over in surprise.

“And that’s our break!” Peridot was sitting upright again. “See?” She says as she blinked at Lapis, “patented.”  
  
Lapis shook her head, “I miss the sound of Real Housewives in the background.”   
  
Peridot snorted and took a sip of some fluffy looking sugar drink, “think of all the free time you’ll have after this.”

Lapis leaned on the table with her elbow, “For high-end jeopardy this time, yes.” She pushed her test aside, looking slowly back up to Peridot, a beat passed. “What do you do with your free time?”  
  
Peridot raised her eyebrows, “By God.” Peridot put her hand over her heart, “Weeks of sharing an office and it’s finally happened.”   
  
Lapis had a feeling this was going to annoy her, “What?”   
  
“You started asking personal questions about me!”   
  
Lapis reached over and flicked the air in front of her, “Haha,” she sits back, “I take it back. I assume you stick your head in a hole and suck helium in your free time.” 

Peridot put her hands up, “helium?”  
  
Lapis pointed at her neck, “to explain the voice.”   
  
Peridot scowled at her slightly, “I never thought people in Wyoming would be so...charming.”   
  
Lapis blinked a couple times and rearranged her legs, “I’m from New York.”   
  
Peridot gave her that cat-like grin, “that explains a lot.”   
  
Lapis laughed and felt her body shake a little bit, “You got me.” She winked, “I’m kind of an asshole. But!” She cheers, “I do appreciate you getting my outlets for me and everything.” She gave her a thumbs up, “I’ll stop sticking gum under your desk when you aren’t looking.”   
  
“One,” Peridot was wrinkling her nose, “I already knew that first part. And two,” she bopped her nose lightly, “I hope your joking about the last part.”

Lapis raises her eyebrows, “Or?”   
  
Peridot’s eyes were wide, “I’ll make you eat it.”   
  
Lapis threw her head back and laughed, “bully! Bullied by a nerd.”   
  
They smile at each other softly for a moment, Peridot rearranged her hands, “I do art.”   
  
“What?”   
  
Peridot looked up, “In my free time. I run a twitter and I make stuff. Plus my own little gadget inventions, but I’m sure you could guess that.”

“A twitter? And art?” Lapis’s mouth just hung open, “now you’re just pulling my leg.”  
  
Peridot frowned at her, “No really! I’m not very good at it, but uh,” She scratched her neck, “It’s...it’s nice.”   
  
Lapis just tilts her head to the side, “Huh.”   
  
“How about you?” Peridot practically fell forward to look at her, “tell me about your free time.”   
  
Lapis shrugged, “I watch trash TV and fall asleep with melted ice cream in my lap.” She wished she was lying.   
  
Peridot blew air out of her nose, “Alright, tell me why you came to Kitt then.” She blinked, “all the way from the East Coast?”   
  
Lapis’s eyes glazed over and she felt her hands go a little lifeless in front of her, her head tilted down to the unmarked tests. “You know,” She said softly, “Drove until my car broke down.” She looked away, “There was an entire house for sale for $600 bucks. For real.”   
  
Her body went a little still and she hoped Peridot has the social graces not to prod her.

The little woman cleared her throat, “I hear that.”  
  
Lapis blinked a couple times, “What?”   
  
Peridot lifted her chin, “The house. They practically gave it to me for free when I got here.”   
  
Lapis hummed, “alright. How’d you end up in small town middle of nowhere America?"   
  
She grinned, “My aunt died.”   
  
“Oh.”   
  
Peridot put her arms out, “She left me her huge house she built on Bill’s Bluff and it wasn’t an offer I wanted to refuse.”   
  
“Huh,” Lapis was staring at her, “just like that?” Even Lapis had a few qualms when she picked up and moved her whole life- even though she felt she didn’t really have a choice by that time.

Peridot took a deep breath, “Okay, not _that_ quick. I was just going to clear out her things and sell it buuuut,” she fiddled with her pen, Lapis waited for her. “But,” she shrugs, “It was the right time.”   
  
Lapis nodded quickly at her, “I get it.” She said softly and looked out the glass door window.   
  
Peridot threaded her hand through her short blonde hair, “And actually I was pretty damn surprised.”   
  
Lapis lifted her eyebrows, “By the cow smell? I find it almost earthy once I got over the gagging.”   
  
Peridot chuckled, “Nah,” She peered over her short eyelashes, “I kinda thought people would be a little more...aggressive? Maybe?” She pointed at her brown corduroy pants, button-up and short hair, Lapis nodded back. “You know.”

“Don’t underestimate tiny libertarian America,” she said wistfully with her chin in her hand, “Everyone just wants to be left alone when they come this far out.” Lapis looked off into the distance, she wished that was true at least.

Peridot blinked a couple times, “wow.” She smiled over in her direction, “You’re pretty insightful for a biology teacher.”  
  
Lapis kicked her under the table before Peridot laughed and rubbed the bruise on her shin, “Ow,” she winced, “Alright, alright.”   
  
Lapis wagged her finger, “I’ll give you a swirly next.”   
  
Peridot rolled her eyes, “We’ve taken way more than a five minute break.” Peridot got out her next manila folder of tests, “Plus, I need to stop myself before I get a wedgie I assume.” She winked, “You’re a little too much fun to tease you know.”   
  
Lapis felt her face heat up despite herself at the gesture, she quickly turned back to Billy Newhouse’s terrible handwriting.

“And the deal is if I don’t finish in four hours you grade the rest for me, right?” She kept her eyes down.

“No.” Peridot said simply, “though I assume grading biology tests would take half the time as mine for me.”

She kicked her again.

\----------------

It’s late evening before they actually finish, they had stopped to get lunch that took almost two hours with their gibbering but somehow managed to push through the last few hours.

Lapis didn’t remember the frantic in-between conversations, mostly arguing and some heated collective righteous anger about coral bleaching in the Australian reefs. Nothing said science like outrage over Global Warming.

She found herself hoping Peridot would ask her to do this again.

Instead, she’s packing up her things and side-eyeing the other woman. She started to place her bag on her shoulder without looking back.

She heard Peridot clear her throat weakly from behind her, “This was,” Her voice was uncertain. Lapis looked over her shoulder and raised an eyebrow, Peridot cleared her throat again, “this was fun.”  
  
She seemed a little red in the face.

Lapis’s mouth quirked up despite herself, “Well, we had power outlets.” She tilted her head with a smile, “And decent company.”

“I...yeah.” Peridot looked like she was fiddling with something in her head.

Lapis pointed outside, “You walking?”  
  
Peridot’s eyes flicked over to the dark churning sky outside, “Seems so.” She said weakly, probably knowing that the sky would break open on her like an egg the moment they walked out.

Lapis pointed with her chin, “Come on.”  
  
Peridot finished picking up her mountains of papers, “Come where?”   
  
Lapis gestured her over quickly, “I’m offering you a ride.” She looked her up and down, “Again, only if you don’t mind dog hair.”   
  
Peridot smiled, “I don’t mind.” 

Lapis lead Peridot to her Oldsmobile and they get in with a bit of shuffling and backpack stuffing, Peridot seemed to fit nicely into her bucket seat.

She grinned, “I haven’t had a car in forever.”  
  
Lapis glanced at her, “Where are you from?”

Peridot glanced at her, “Maine originally, but I was living in Knoxville as a graduate student and teacher before this.”  
  
“Huh,” Lapis hummed and started her engine, “A city girl I assume.”   
  
She nodded, “through and through.” She reached her arms out, “But this is for the best now.”   
  
Lapis backed up slowly, not really having to look behind her as she swerved out, no one was around. Peridot gave her brief directions to the house on Bill’s Bluff and Lapis pretended to not already knew where it was.

“Okay,” she started on down the road, “Actual dream job, go.”   
  
Peridot blinked, “Um,” She furrowed her brow, “this?”   
  
“Beep, wrong answer. Real answer is guy who taste-tests A1-sauce steak flavors.”   
  
“Gross.”   
  
“Or dolphin trainer where you are the dolphin.”   
  
“Weird.”   
  
Lapis shook her head, “You have no taste.”   
  
Peridot sat back, “pokemon trainer then.”   
  
Lapis blew a raspberry, “What? You want to both look twelve and be twelve forever?”   
  
“Duh,” Peridot laughed, “who wants to grow old?” Lapis glanced over to where Peridot was staring out the window into the bleak lumpy sky. It was surreal for a moment.

She cleared her throat, “I do.” She blinked, “So I can taste-test A1-sauce.”  
  
Peridot snorted, “is this why we got put in the same office?” She leaned over the empty space between them, “Because we’re both weird-os?”   
  
Lapis laughed, “Speak for yourself.” She winks, “We go the same office because we both teach science. The hard way.” 

Perdot hummed, “Hard way, yes,” she straightened her jacket out, “With thoughtful and insightful lessons.”

“No, I meant with rocks,” Lapis blinked, “that’s my biology final. I make them throws rocks at each other for an alpha grade.”

Peridot patted her on the shoulder as they turn onto her long driveway to the crooked brown house, “My weirdo theory is becoming more promising by the moment.” Lapis rolled her eyes, “And my second theory.”   
  
“Does that one have something to do with getting my skirt pulled down?”

Peridot eyed her, “No.” She sat up straight and held Lapis’s eyes, “It’s for both being brilliant.” Peridot untucks her legs, “In equally respectable fields.”   
  
Lapis raised both eyebrows and realized that Peridot was conceding something. Lapis sniffed, “If this is some new-age teasing…”   
  
Peridot grabbed for her bag as the car slowed down, “Not at all.” She faced Lapis, “And I would love to do this again.”   
  
“Oh.”

Peridot nodded, “I have even more grading tips.”  
  
Lapis gave a crooked smile, “I’ll bring my good pen.”   
  
Peridot began to wave, “Say hi to Lady Macbeth for me!” She jumped out of the car and Lapis just opened and closed her mouth.

She can only watch her back recede toward the large sturdy building.

She has a brief moment of imagining inviting someone this year to Not-Dead-Todd’s Blowout Fireworks party. She backs out of the driveway slowly.


	5. Everyone Has Issues

Lapis was standing outside with her head against the wall, tilting it back so she could look at the churning dark skies and windy thick bluffs overhead. She took a deep breath and stuffed her hands in her pockets.

She could still smell the ash from Mr. Rigby’s cigarette, Lapis had given up smoking when she moved here but there was something nice about going outside and pretending.

She closed her eyes and lets the cool breeze whip around her ankles, a warm thirsty spring was just around the corner and you could smell it in the air. Lapis was already thinking about summer and going somewhere else that was far away and sterile.

Though there weren’t that many other places in the world quiet as remote as Kitt Wyoming. Lapis is staring off haphazardly into the whistling skies when the first splattering of rain dripped down onto her forehead.

“Fine,” She wiped at her forehead and turned back into the school reluctantly, she was barely ready for the next crack of thunder on the horizon.

She jumped and quickly turned to slip into the emergency exit that was propped open and back into the gym. The gym was filled the sound of squeaking sneakers and kids yelling at each other as a ball was passed back and forth.

She waved as she saw Amethyst whistling at her students to ‘show some hustle’- that was her favorite phrase she appropriated from every gym movie ever.

Lapis waved and ignored the student’s who were eyeing her for appearing from nowhere, she just grinned, she liked being an enigma to them. The door closed behind her just as the wind picked up and she could hear the smattering of sharp droplets against the gym windows.

She crept passed the beat up bleachers and into the blue hallways at the top of the school, she approached the busted vending machine next to the water fountain and gave it a forlorn look.

She still had twenty-two minutes before her next glass was going to start.

“To funion or not to funion?” She leaned dramatically on the glass, “That is the ingestion.”  
  
“Miss Lazuli?”   
  
Lapis jumped as she heard a voice call from behind her, she cursed in her head for the timing between making terrible puns and witnesses to it. She turned around slowly to see the administrative duo.

Lapis did a small little bow, “Pearl,” She stood up straight, “Garnet.”  
  
Garnet was looking at her with the controlled air of someone who had just discovered Nirvana for the first time. Restrained delight. 

She tried not to look at her as the tall woman gave her a knowing look.

“How can I help you ladies today?” She kept a straight face.  
  
Pearl did not look like she was going to acknowledge Lapis’s antics, she instead adjusts her clipboard in her hands, “I just had a small question Miss Lazuli.”   
  
Lapis lifted her chin and crossed her arms over her chest, “Shoot.”   
  
Pearl clicked the pen in her hands a couple times, “I wanted to check in with on how your next semester lesson planning was going.”   
  
Lapis internally groaned, or maybe she did externally too, she was caught up in already forming a headache at the thought of it. “It’s still March.”   
  
“The _end_ of march,” Pearl sang, “and the sooner the better.” 

Lapis rubbed at her temples, “Here...Compromise.” She stuck a finger in the air and pointed, “You buy a new vending machine,” She wiggles her finger, “And I’ll make the next five curriculums for next year.”  
  
Pearl just sighed heavily, “We only need 2.” She points at her lightly, “Get on it.”

Lapis could only nod wearily, “Worth a shot.”  
  
Garnet was observing her as well, “Are you bringing anything to the fireworks show Lapis?”   
  
Lapis paused as she realized they were easing back from work talk, she turned to Garnet valiantly, “Lime mashed potatoes or party poppers I guess.”   
  
“No,” Pearl was wrinkling her nose.

“You?” Lapis asked politely back.

Garnet was nodding, “My mums are coming down this year. So something tex mex and Pearl was getting a cotton candy machine.”  
  
“Did I really agree to that?” Pearl already looked tired, she was murmuring as she checked something on a list.

“You should stay for the whole thing this year.” Garnet said she turned back around, “Bring someone.”  
  
Lapis shook her head, “Not-Dead-Todd’s Fireworks blowout is for celebrating being alive.” She pushed her bangs back, “and I think that would kill me.”   
  
They both laughed and Pearl has to cover her mouth as she snorted under her breath, “I get it! Because she’s bad at relationships.”   
  
Lapis was about to extract herself, happily able to take their minds off her unfinished lesson plans for next year, “Well…” She began to try and creep away.

“And Lapis,” She paused as Pearl addressed her, “Will you tell Peridot I want to talk to her as well? If you see her that is.”  
  
Lapis blinked a couple times, “Isn’t she just in the office?”   
  
Pearl frowned slightly, “we checked. It was empty.”   
  
Lapis raised both eyebrows, “She sometimes goes to the teachers lounge.” They just shook their heads, “Huh...I guess, yeah, I’ll be right back.” She didn’t know why that fact bothered her but she started to speed walk past the drenched windows and toward the second hall anyway.

It wasn’t like Peridot to be conspicuously nowhere.

She had just seen her this morning, they had switched coffees as a joke and Lapis had felt the familiar feeling of almost choking under all the tension. It had been a couple weeks since they started grading papers together.

It had been a couple days since Lapis let Peridot meet her dogs.

She walked quickly past a gaggle of wandering seniors who waved at her, “Miss L, will you get me suspended next?”  
  
“Only if you’re lucky Henry,” She said dryly back and goes to reach for her classroom door.

“Come on, Patrick is a mess over it.”  
  
“He deserves it!” 

She tuned them out as she jiggled the door open, neither her nor Peridot were teaching during the fifth hour since most students had lunch and Lapis insisted on taking fourth and fifth for herself. She furrowed her brow as she walked into the next dark room.

“Peridot?” She called out softly and made her way to the starburst yellow office, “You here?” The next room was dark as well, empty save the distant noise of clattering rain and a strip of thunder that crackled far away.

Lapis looked in both directions before she heard the faint sound of music. She raised both eyebrows and looked behind the door and then around the filing cabinet.

“Peridot?” She tried again, she doesn’t see the other teacher in her chair but ended up bending over to inspect her desk anyway. Her eyes went wide, “Peridot?”

She saw a tuft of bright yellow hair sticking up from under a faded hood.  
  
Peridot was apparently huddled under her desk with her headphones in and a ratty hoodie pulled over her usual tweed jacket, her face was pressed up against her knees, posture tense.

“Hey,” she reached down but Peridot doesn’t look up, “Hey,” she said again this time more loudly, “You alright?” If almost felt like a dumb question, but Lapis plowed ahead anyway.  
  
Peridot barely looked up as Lapis loomed over her, Lapis recognized a look of abject misery as she gathered herself deeper into the cubby of the desk. Her eyes almost swimming.

“Go away.”

“Can I…Help?” Lapis got down on her hands and knees so she could face her.

Peridot just shook her head, “Forget about it.” Her green eyes flashed up, “this.”  
  
Lapis was at loss for what to do, she wasn’t usually on the comforting end of things but Peridot had the look of someone who needed a comfort about her at that moment. Lapis bit her lip and crept a little closer.

“How bout them Broncos?” She gave a strained laugh and tried to get Peridot’s attention.

_Crrrrrck_

The other woman flinched violently as distant thunder spits outside through the spring air.

“Are you afraid of thunder?” She put her hand on Peridot’s knee in some attempt to soothe her.

Peridot’s hand was clutching her phone as it played what appeared to be Bohemian Rhapsody, “Please,” she almost begged, “I don’t want you to...this isn’t who I...” Peridot’s eyes squeezed shut and Lapis pushes on her gently.

“Well,” she took a deep breath, “scoot over.”  
  
Peridot blinked up and her mouth went a little slack, “what?”   
  
“What?” Lapis gave a cheeky grin, her distraction partly a success. “Girl can’t hide under a desk with her coworkers?” She tisked. “I’m afraid of things too. Student’s mostly.”

Peridot scowled slightly, “you don’t have to make fun of me.”  
  
“I’m not!” Lapis reached out, almost part-way under the desk already, “I just,” she sighed, “I’m trying to, you know, I’m sorry.” She frowned and pushed Peridot’s loose hairs back off her forehead. “It’s just weird to see you upset.”   
  
Peridot cringed, she gave a large sniff, “I’ll be back to me in a second.”   
  
Lapis put her chin on Peridot’s knee, “You don’t have to.” She said softly, “I don’t mind.”   
  
“Ugh,” Peridot unfurled one of her legs slowly, “I’m a mess.”   
  
Lapis scooted up fully next to her, “Join the club.” She tried to flick her, “We can fall apart together.”   
  
“You’re not,” she looked her up and down as her words trailed off.

Lapis laughed, “I’m always.”  
  
Peridot just shook her head and looked away, “Does this happen with every storm?” Lapis frowned, “I could, we could.” She hummed, “Figure something out for those days.”

Peridot picked at her fingers, “I just got dumb.”  
  
“More than usual?” Lapis reached out and tried to hold her gaze again, Peridot wasn’t laughing though.

She softly rubbed her shoulder, “Hey,” she leaned in, “If there is one thing you are not Peridot,” her breath licked Peridot’s cheek, “you’re at least not dumb.”  
  
She felt a head rest against her shoulder, Peridot slumped up against her, they stay there for a long moment as Peridot put her head on her shoulder and took deep breaths. “I had a couple more reasons why I wanted to come here.”   
  
“Yeah?”

Lapis felt her rifling around in her pocket for something.

She brought out a flat plastic green coin and Lapis can only cock her eyebrow up, “Is that…?”  
  
“Six month coin,” Peridot says heavily, “the city didn’t make it easy before this.”   
  
“Oh.”   
  
“Yeah.” Peridot says wearily, “It was working too.”

“But?” Lapis didn’t mean to prompt her but she was suddenly a little curious. She couldn’t imagine Peridot drinking, much less enough to justify AA meeting sobriety coins.

Peridot gave a small smile, “I thought I’d stop drinking _and_ stoptaking my anxiety pills. That didn’t really help.”   
  
“Oh,” Lapis blinked a couple times, “Well, I mean, good on you for the chip though.”   
  
Peridot gazed back out toward her with soft green eyes, “Don’t look so smart now, do I?”   
  
Lapis leaned forward and, despite her better judgement, she pressed a kiss to the top of her forehead, “Don’t be silly.” She grinned, “Dumb? You? No. You’re my favorite science teacher.”   
  
She smiled with her teeth and Peridot looked up at her with her little mouth open, lips parted, Lapis was staring at it. “You’re something else Lazuli.” She leaned her head on her shoulder and they sit there in silence for a very very long moment.

“For the record,” Peridot said thickly from beside her as they sat under her desk, “You’re pretty bright yourself.”

She smiled to herself, cheeks tinted red and heart beating a little fast. “Want to come to this weird party with me?”   
  
“Yeah,” Peridot was smiling widely again, “with my second favorite science teacher, of course.”   
  
“Second?” Lapis wrinkled her nose, “I’m trying to be sentimental here.”   
  
“You’re still in the running with Bill Nye,” she leared playfully, her usual self shining through, “Don’t get a big head.”   
  
“Really?” Lapis laughed, “Someone’s big head sounds like it needs a noogie.”   
  
“I just told you I was a recovering alcoholic, this is no way to a new town member.” Peridot struggled in her arms as they bump and wiggle under the desk.

“Noogies are better than a stiff drink, stop moving.”   
  
“Ah!” Peridot kicked out and Lapis laughed.

“There,” she kissed her on the cheek, “Let’s call that a noogie before I get winded.”  
  
Peridot took her own hood down, looking at Lapis sweetly in the dimness, “K.” She leaned over and Lapis feels a kiss to the side of her mouth, “I’m looking forward to your party thing then.”   
  
Lapis’s heart jumped into her throat and her mouth went dry. She looked up at her, face almost glowing in the dark. She could have stayed curled up like that, under her desk, with that look on her face, for the rest of the day. Instead, the school bell rings and they both bump their heads on the top.

Lapis was still smiling, she didn’t stop smiling.


End file.
